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Settlers of Catan Cake Helps Me Win Every Time

by Jack Kieffer

I’m not the best Settlers of Catan player, I’m going to be honest.  By “not the best,” I mean that I always lose.  By “honest,” I mean that I’m a lying little rat in the sewer, because NOBODY EVER BEATS ME AT ANYTHING.  You don’t understand the level of competition that I am at – I will burn down your house before I let you beat me in a game of squash.  I will put hundreds of forks into your front lawn before I let you take me down in COD.  I will steal your homegrown tomatoes even if you let me win, because I’m a jerk and those things are delicious.

settlers of catan cake

This Settlers of Catan cake is one of a kind, because it actually can be pulled apart!  Each of the hexes comes off as a bite-sized piece of deliciousness, and the board even has little edible pieces!  “Those are plastic.”  That in no way indicates that they are not edible!  *Eats pieces*

That giant Kalli Cakes logo is obstructing my view, and it’s only on there because the creator is afraid of Samoan pirates internet pirates stealing her stuff.  I always give credit where credit is due, as long as that credit makes me look better.  I feed off of public opinion, my precious. You pirating internet sleaze-bags have ruined my chances of experiencing this cake in all of its glory!

If you like the Settlers of Catan cake, I suggest that you check out the Ninja Cake Pops and the Walking Dead Birthday Cake.  I’m not sure if you will like them, but I like them, and I push my views onto others.  People generally don’t like me, and I generally don’t like people, so it’s a kind of symbiotic ignoring-ship.

[via That’s Nerdalicious]

This post was written by Jack, lead blogger at Cool Gizmo Toys. Jack puts together lists to help geeks quickly find the stuff that they love, and has a free eBook that you can get today!

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