Is there a steaming, writhing mass of ramen threatening to breach the walls of your bowl? Are rolls of sushi piling up on your plate? Are you freaked out by the skinless sashimi? Ask your commanding officer for a pair of Attack on Titan chopsticks. They look just like the grappling hook and plug-in blades used by the soldiers in the franchise. They even have the blade holsters that you can use to store the sticks.
Bite your thumb and stomp your way to NCSX, which is selling the chopsticks for about $21 (USD) per pair.