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Hurricane Matthew Kitesurfer: Balls of Steel, or Balls of Stupid?

by Shane McGlaun
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I bet this kitesurfer over in Florida was super gung-ho to get out there in the massive surf and winds created by Hurricane Matthew. He probably thought he was going to be famous and stuff, and he sort of is. I mean I can see in those few seconds as his kite keeps soaring into the air that he was trying to decide if he needed to jump or if he would end up in Oz if he hung on.

kite-surf-sphincter-burstzoom in

I can also imagine he crapped himself (at least he wore his black wetsuit) and perhaps had a heart attack right in his butthole. I’m not sure that is possible, but I bet if he farted at the zenith of that kite climb only dogs would have heard it.

Somehow, he managed to land it, and undoubtedly he went home and asked all his friends if they had recorded the news that day. I can only imagine he would have died if he fell off or at least broke his ass and ended up in the iron butt.

iron-buttzoom in

[via Jalopnik]

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