Because who doesn’t want to go out with a bang, Cremation Solutions has developed the Loved One Launcher – a hand cannon designed for spreading the ashes of a deceased loved one like they’re confetti at a New Year’s party. Honestly, I can think of worse ways to go. Not very many, mind you, but a few.
The $375 cannon is powered by two C02 cartridges and can launch ashes up to 75-feet in the air, perfect for raining back down on everyone in attendance, leaving them all to try to brush the remains of crazy Uncle Karl off their shoulders in a panic. It’s perfect.
But let’s say you don’t have any ashes to spread at the moment – can the Loved One Launcher be repurposed as a t-shirt cannon? I’m asking for a funeral parlor/half-time show company I’m thinking about starting. I’ve already got the giant skeleton mascot costume.