Available as a limited-edition collaboration between Velveeta and Nails.INC, the Pinkies Out Polish Creamy Smooth Cheese Scented Nail Polish Duo is a $15 two-pack of Velveeta-inspired nail polish that smells like cheese when dried. The pinnacle of human achievement: we’ve finally reached it. I never imagined it would happen in my lifetime, yet here we are.
Per Velveeta’s official announcement: “What’s up, mother forkers – We’re introducing the world to Velveeta Pinkies Out Polish, a red and yellow cheese-scented polish that’s bold, over-the-top, and made to stand out with your smallest finger out. That’s #LaDolceVelveeta.” Wow, first we reach the pinnacle of human achievement, then I’m addressed by a cheese company as a ‘mother forker’ – today is just full of surprises.
So, the question remains: if my wife is wearing Velveeta cheese-scented nail polish, am I going to try nibbling her fingernails when she puts her arm around me? That remains to be seen. Or, in my case, tasted. So yes, the answer is yes – I am absolutely going to do that.