These Chocolate Bars Are Shockingly Unpleasant
April 18th, 2010
I don’t know what it is with cheap-o novelty makers and their insistence on making mock versions of everyday objects that intentionally jolt you with electricity. I suppose we can blame those old Adams joy buzzer tricks for inspiring such malevolent goods. So here we have the latest in a long line of nasty surprises – shock chocolate (say that ten times fast.)
And these aren’t just any shocking candy bars, nope, they induce “HAPPYNESS BECAUSE OF SHOCK.” Did they recently see that horrible Will Smith movie, or did they come up with that spelling all on their own? Either way, I can assure you that these battery-charged chocolate bars contain Golden Ticket straight to cardiac arrest.
Despite the fact that the product listing says “harmless shocking chocolate,” it goes on to say…
**NOT suitable for children under 14!
**NOT suitable for people suffering from epilepsy, heart disease, or similar illnesses!
**NOT suitable for pregnant lady!
**DO NOT taunt Happy Fun Ball!
Sorry, had to put that last one in there. If you’re really feeling mischievous (and your victim doesn’t fall into one of the above categories), you can get you rotten little hands on these over at Gadget4All for $6 (USD) a bar.