I learned a few things the hard way when my son was born. For instance, I knew you had to keep a hand on the baby while they were on the changing table lest he roll off. No one told me the second you take off a diaper, the baby will literally pee everywhere. I mean I had no idea until he started screaming because he peed in his own eye, on the wall, on my arm, and directly onto the other clean diapers in the instant I looked away for a wipe. I didn’t even know it was possible to pee in your own eye before that incident.
They also don’t tell you that baby poo smells like a turd’s turd and that a baby can literally shit out its own weight into a single diaper. If they told us this stuff ahead of time, no one would have kids, and humanity would go extinct. Fortunately, inventor Colin Furze has invented something that all parents will want, it’s a dirty baby washing machine.
It doesn’t tumble the baby around or anything. This thing started life as a jet hand dryer, but with some major upgrades. It squirts water and blows the poo off without the need to touch stinky diapers. Its sort of like a baby bidet. There’s one fatal flaw in Colin’s design though, because trust me, kids will pee as soon as that jet air comes on and it will go everywhere.
[via Laughing Squid]