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Giant Ant Toys: There Goes The Picnic

 |  |  |  |  November 14, 2021

By hite

Makers of the entirely unnecessary but absolutely wanted, Archie McPhee is selling these giant ant toys for $8. Available in a package of six, each hard vinyl insect measures 2-3/4″ long from antennae to ant butt and is sure to get a rise out of my wife when she finds them in the pantry. I think it goes without saying, but breakfast in bed will probably be out of the question that morning.

The six-pack includes two each of black, brown, and red ants. I remember getting stung by a bunch of red ants before. Not my fondest memory. My fifth birthday either. I asked for a Nintendo Game Boy, but do you know what I got? Poison ivy.

Be sure to bring some along on your next picnic! Maybe they’ll scare the real ants away. Or maybe they’ll mate and give rise to a new race of giant killer ants. If that happens though I will tell everyone it was all your fault.